What?!
I know, the title of this article doesn’t sound right. No one likes being in the dumps. There’s nothing good about feeling down.
Except sometimes it’s necessary.
Sometimes, life hurts. Things don’t go the way we want. We lose hopes, dreams, people.
We need to feel that stuff.
Feeling means we’re dealing, processing, moving through. That is good.
I wrote recently about pausing in stressful moments, scheduling a later time to feel the feelings, and immediately considering the question: what good could possibly be seeking to emerge in my life right now?
I stand behind this practice. It has helped me a lot personally, and it’s a practical way to redirect our thinking from panic to possibility.
And, it’s not appropriate in every rough moment. Sometimes, we need to go the other direction instead–first, feel.
That’s where I have found myself recently.
After getting some worrisome news, I remembered the appointment practice and felt somewhat revolted by it. I had no energy or capacity to shift into that gear, which is a pretty good indication of when it’s NOT the way to go!
So, I didn’t.
I cried and journaled and generally festered. I let myself feel down, and I knew that was good and right for this particular moment.
I am still open to possibilities, even in this situation. Good things could open up in any number of unexpected and even magical ways. I just can’t anticipate and imagine them now. In this case, moving in that direction requires feeling in the dumps first.
In stressful or painful moments, this is up to each of us to discern.
Can we pause on feeling the feelings, schedule a time to dig into them, and examine the possibilities?
OR is this a moment where we need to feel–to be in some version of the dumps–first?
Either approach can lead us forward and toward bigger, better possibilities. We just need to stay true to ourselves to get there. That is good.