If you tend to carry a lot in your mind, or do multiple things at once, you’re probably used to feeling stressed and overwhelmed.
It’s exhausting, I know.
This way of operating is a recipe for being less effective all around. It eats away at spontaneity, creativity and our availability to the people around us. Way too often, I catch myself mentally working while physically going through the motions with my kids. Not ideal.
So, I’ve done some reflection and research. What are the best ways to clear out mental clutter and be more present? I’m less interested in tips like meditation, getting more sleep and minding my diet. These are good pieces of advice, but I’ve yearned for practical strategies on how to orient and action steps for a clearer head.
Here’s what’s helped me most.
1. Systems create order. Order creates clarity.
Two types of systems perpetuate such clarity: inner and outer ones.
Regarding latter, my lifelong best friend, Taylor Spellman, is an interior designer. She’s amazingly talented and generally one of the best people I know.
When Taylor came to visit earlier this year (back when traveling used to be a thing), she helped me recognize where and how systems would be useful in our home. She helped organize my kids’ daily meditations (there are quite a few of them) into bins: “need to do today” and “already done today.” As I wrote back then: “Now there’s less clutter on my kitchen table and no time or energy wasted on figuring out what needs to happen.”
She helped me see that wherever there’s clutter, there’s room for a better physical setup. For you, it may not be your kids’ medicines, but there are probably a few other places where this applies.
Taylor says a fairly common problem area is where we keep keys, wallets, headphones, sunglasses and all the stuff we typically need before running out the door. She suggests having a “command center,” like a tray or box where this stuff lives.
Taylor says: “Your command center can be wherever is most convenient for you, but do yourself the favor of getting into the habit of using it. Let’s be honest, you have better things to do with your time than ask the frantic, ‘where are the keys??!!’ question…daily.”
Regarding our internal systems, productivity consultant and creator of the time management method “Getting Things Done,” David Allen, suggests constantly unloading our brains in a three-step process.
First, write down everything that pulls on your psyche. Whatever crosses your mind that may be even remotely important, goes on a master list. Second, when viewing that list later, for each item that requires further steps, write your desired outcome and the next action. Finally, Allen suggests creating maps of the various open projects, so you’re able to step back and see the full picture.
Just like what Taylor described, there’s a lot of room to individualize this. See how the basic principle might work for you.
2. When you have something you need to do, just do it.
No multitasking. No checking social media. No checking your phone. Sit down, and do the job.
If it’s a longer project, breaks will be necessary, but make those breaks intentional and occasional.
For me, this means no more days of writing two sentences then shopping on Amazon. Two more sentences, grab a snack.
As I’ve committed to this, I’ve grown much better at completing tasks in a timely way (I’ll admit, caffeine undoubtedly helps). I’ve come a long way with doing what I need to do and promptly clearing it from my head. It requires discipline, but it’s huge.
3. Ask yourself, “Is this useful?” when your thoughts get loud.
While driving the other day, I started thinking about past regrets. Then I started dipping into shame and sadness. It was a beautiful sunny day, my happy little girl was in the back seat, and I was thinking myself into an abyss.
When I noticed what I was doing and asked myself the aforementioned question, I realized that no, it was not useful. I said a quick prayer for all involved, and let it go.
Releasing thoughts that aren’t useful can dislodge a lot of mental junk. Then, as we create more space and gain a clearer mind, we have more bandwidth for things that really matter. This has been working pretty well for me at least.
I hope it’s useful for you, too.