Genuine happiness is not determined by our circumstances. It doesn’t arise from what we have or what we can do. Instead, research suggests that true happiness comes from a proactively cultivated positive mindset. It takes work.
What’s involved? How does one cultivate said positive mindset?
I’m glad you asked!
A therapist once told me to post a list of things that bring me joy in a visible place. He said bouts of depression and the craziness of life can lead us to forget what makes us feel good. It’s like getting sick and forgetting that you have medicine that can at least start to improve how you feel.
Keeping a list of personal sources of positivity front-and-center can help in those low moments. It’s also empowering. It highlights our ability to help ourselves and reveals specific antidotes for specific occasions.
For example, when I’m in a rut, lunch with friends is a great boost.
When I’m uninspired, watching Oprah or a Ted Talk lights me back up.
When I’m in a midday dip…well, that’s where today’s “two ways to increase positivity now” come from. They provide a reliable jolt.
1. Sing or dance.
I was in an intensive yoga training a few years ago, where we had to dance and chant every morning. I was annoyed and not in the mood every single time we started. But just as consistently, I was lighter and brighter every single time we ended.
The key is to be as expressive as possible, even if your voice is awful and your moves are embarrassing. Action changes the way we feel. Put on some music, or not, and just do it.
2. Think of what you’re grateful for right now.
Come up with unique stuff. Not “my family,” “my health.” More like “the keyboard that I’m typing on at this moment.” Take a deep breath and mentally list a good five to 10 things.
Gratitude is a pathway out of pits. The percentage of time we’re grateful is pretty darn close to the percentage of time we’re happy, so go all in.
Keep these things in mind for a quick and dependable boost in your mood, and I also encourage making your own list of feel-good-stuff.
Happiness will come and go, but employing strategies to even slightly increase positivity, creates conditions for it to come around a little more.
It makes the world a happier place.